Friday, June 19, 2009
From the Late Nighters....
"They had elections today in Iran. Apparently it's still too close to call. They say if the vote is still close by tomorrow, there will be a runoff election next week, and then the usual series of lawsuits from Norm Coleman."
---Bill Maher
-
"Mahmud Ahmahaheeha defeated challenger and reform candidate Mir-Hussein Mousavi 62 percent to 33 percent---a landslide victory. Surprising, since the 85 percent turnout typically favors the reform candidates...and election results were strangely announced before the polls closed...and Ahmadineduhjujah won handily even in his opponents' home town...and also he's batshit insane!"
---Jon Stewart
-
"This guy, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, is claiming victory. He is very unpopular. And the danger is this: he could ruin the political career of his brother, Jeb."
---David Letterman
-
"Massive protests continued today in Iran. Hundreds of thousands of people swarmed the streets to protest what they believe was election fraud in the re-election of President Mahmud Amembersonlyjacket. And even though our president has been very careful not to weigh in too heavily on the controversy, the government of Iran today accused the United States of 'intolerable meddling' in its internal affairs. Sounds to me like Iran has been watching too much Scooby-Doo."
---Jimmy Kimmel
-
"In recent days Iran has fallen into complete chaos over the Iranian presidential election, which pitted the incumbent president against the reformer, Mir-Hussein-in-the-Membrane Mousavi. You can tell he's the reformer for two reasons. One, he chants 'Terminal illness to America,' and he only wants to wipe Israel off Google Earth."
---Stephen Colbert
-
"In Iran, people protesting the election results have been avoiding the government media crackdown by posting messages on Twitter. The tweets declare that Ahmadinejad stole the election and that Jabir is enjoying a lamb kebab."
---Conan O'Brien
---Bill Maher
-
"Mahmud Ahmahaheeha defeated challenger and reform candidate Mir-Hussein Mousavi 62 percent to 33 percent---a landslide victory. Surprising, since the 85 percent turnout typically favors the reform candidates...and election results were strangely announced before the polls closed...and Ahmadineduhjujah won handily even in his opponents' home town...and also he's batshit insane!"
---Jon Stewart
-
"This guy, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, is claiming victory. He is very unpopular. And the danger is this: he could ruin the political career of his brother, Jeb."
---David Letterman
-
"Massive protests continued today in Iran. Hundreds of thousands of people swarmed the streets to protest what they believe was election fraud in the re-election of President Mahmud Amembersonlyjacket. And even though our president has been very careful not to weigh in too heavily on the controversy, the government of Iran today accused the United States of 'intolerable meddling' in its internal affairs. Sounds to me like Iran has been watching too much Scooby-Doo."
---Jimmy Kimmel
-
"In recent days Iran has fallen into complete chaos over the Iranian presidential election, which pitted the incumbent president against the reformer, Mir-Hussein-in-the-Membrane Mousavi. You can tell he's the reformer for two reasons. One, he chants 'Terminal illness to America,' and he only wants to wipe Israel off Google Earth."
---Stephen Colbert
-
"In Iran, people protesting the election results have been avoiding the government media crackdown by posting messages on Twitter. The tweets declare that Ahmadinejad stole the election and that Jabir is enjoying a lamb kebab."
---Conan O'Brien
Friday, June 12, 2009
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